Bathroom Renovations

I started the project thinking it would just be some bathroom color.  Well, then came an extra layer of mold resistant paint, and painting the trim, and fixing the drooping ceiling, then cleaning and sealing the grout between the tiles, and finally caulking the area between the sink/bath and the tiles.  I just can't make things easy for myself...I am the certainly the daughter of a true handyman.  Growing up I watched my dad fix everything, and make anything.  He single handedly built every home I have ever lived in, he taught himself everything there is to know about building a house and everything there is to go in it, tiling, plumbing, electricity, etc.  He even went to school to learn how to install cable.  The houses he made were beautiful and some of them were even featured in magazines because they were that good!  When I was growing up my dad would always include me in these projects, he taught me how to use a nail gun, how to insulate a house, electrical work, wood splitting, etc.  And he never once made me feel like I shouldn't be doing these things, and always encouraged me even though these are not the stereotypical things a young girl is supposed to do.  He would try to teach me things sometimes to my dismay, he always wanted me to be prepared on the road and to know how to jump my car or handle it on the ice, so many of these things I thought I would never have to use and now I regret so much that I did not listen to more of what he had to teach.  You would think a man with so much brawn certainly couldn't also have a heart of gold, but he does...this is the place he stores two small dogs named Binky and Foo Foo, and from the same place he also taught me how to knit, and to cook.  In short...we like to call dad superman...and he certainly is our hero.


Without further ado, let me show you some before and after pictures of some second generation handy work.   

BEFORE

An icky mismatched yellow cream paint color, dirty grout, and some molding caulking in between the basin and tile.  

Notice trim is painted in cream as well, this color is not doing anything for the furniture.

Mostly icky yellow grout, exposed shower wires, and more icky yellow paint.  

AFTER

(We chose a color that we believed would be neutral enough to tie in our turquoise accents, and neutral enough for the landlords to be happy.  Thank you to everyone that recommended colors and helped us with ideas...this was very much appreciated.  When we finish the decorating part we will post more pictures.)

This is a steel grey color, whitened tile grout, and re-sealed basin tile surface.

New white trim looking modern against the grey steel color.  

The Grey is really making the tiles pop, and the nice repainted window trim and floor trim, and clean white grout.

Clean Grout, and new paint.

I still clearly have some more work to do on it, but I already feel so much happier in it...it feels so clean.  I can't wait to post some pictures of the finished decorated product, but I had to post these for those of you who were growing impatient.  

Our First Anniversary Adventure

It's hard to believe that in only a few weeks Trevor and I will have been married for an entire year...I could swear that we got married a few days ago. But, this is not the only important milestone worthy of celebration, somehow February turned out to be the month where everything is happening all at once. Obviously, we will be celebrating valentines day while celebrating our anniversary on the 14th of February, and the next day would be my birthday on the 15^th, and the 19^th marks the first day we started dating 7 YEARS AGO! So, in honor of all these events and the fact we are in a beautiful country we decided we would explore a little bit of the area by starting with what is said to be “the most romantic spot” in the UK, Bath City. Our itinerary is as follows...

The most important stop I want to make is to a Royal Roman Bath called "The Great Bath".  This is an area fed by hot springs where Romans used to bathe, but today the museum does not allow anyone in the water...sigh.  Well probably for good reason, with the bath having many layers of lead, but still.  Archaeological evidence from the site showed that the baths were treated like a shrine to the goddess Sulis Minerva, when a Roman felt that another had done wrong upon him (such as stealing his clothes at the baths) they would use curse tablets writing the name of the suspects and place it somewhere to be read by the goddess (Bowman, et.al, 2007).

The Great Bath

(guardian.co.uk)

There are statues overlooking The Great Bath which include prominent Roman figures such as governors, emperors or military leaders.

Great Bath Statues

(bathvenues.co.uk)

(milestonestours.com)

Even though we can't step foot in The Great Bath there is a wonderful spa next door called Thermae Bath Spa.  The baths at the spa are fed by natural springs, just like the real thing!  We plan to spend a half a day in the baths, and one hour getting a couples massage.  For me it would be really easy to lose as much money in a spa as a gambler could lose in the casinos...but that is why Trevor will be there to make sure I don't get too out of hand!  

The Royal Bath

(visitbathshop.co.uk)

Mineral Bath, Whirlpool and Lazy River

(tasburghhouse.co.uk)

I am not lying when I say that I could live at this spa...looking at it makes me never want to go home and we have never even been here before.  

When we are not at the baths we plan on getting in some sightseeing.  Bath is known for it's amazing architecture, including the Pulteney Bridge, The Royal Crescent buildings as an example of Georgian Architecture, Prior Park Landscape Garden, and The Bath Abbey.  

The Pulteney Bridge

(en.wikipedia.org)


The Royal Crescent Buildings

(wayfaring.info)

Prior Park Landscape Garden

(cotswolds.info)

The Bath Abbey

(religiousintelligence.org)

The Bath Abbey Vaulted Ceiling

(en.wikipedia.org)


After we finish all of our sightseeing we will take a relaxing boat cruise around Bath City.


Bath City Boat Tour

(http://visitbath.co.uk/travel-and-maps/bath-city-boat-trips-p43071)

I also plan on sneaking in some shopping, and we have 3 nights and 4 days of which to accommodate all of this adventure.  So, from Monday the 13th through the end of Thursday the 16th Trevor and I will be incognito, laying low, and relaxing with each other.  And as it turns out there will be a little puppy along for the adventure!  We were originally making plans to go out of country to Paris or Rome, but because we have a little bundle of joy that does not have his pet travel scheme currently, this is not an option this year.  You can tell us we coddle our pet too much, and you may be right.  However, we don't have any family here, or friends that we can trust leaving our dog with here.  We have people that I am sure would but our discomfort with leaving him with someone who doesn't understand rescue dogs, or someone who is inexperienced and accidentally leaves the door open and he runs out and gets killed in the road...we are just not going to chance it.  There are shelters, but they not only cost money, but Trevor and I would never let him go back to one of those, not even for  a brief stay.  Both of us know that we would be incapable of enjoying the vacation if we didn't know that our dog was somewhere safe.  So an anniversary vacation with our dog it is!  It turned out for the best anyway, because we are really excited about this local hence less time en-route destination, it will be cheaper and more fun.  We will post a new blog with our own pictures after we come back.  

The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women

“People travel to wonder at the height of mountains, at the huge waves of the sea, at the long courses of rivers, at the vast compass of the ocean, at the circular motion of the stars; and they pass by themselves without wondering.”

~St. Augustine

           Lately I have been doing a lot of self reflection, and no it is not because of the New Year 2012 it's because I feel like I have made some enormous changes in my life in a very short period of time. I think everyone knows the feeling, it's where everything is changing around you and you feel like your watching it in slow motion unable to alter anything in your course. And while, this post is not especially applicable to a travel themed blog, I think it presents the real behind the scenes feelings that I am going through as a part of these very big changes.  I have had this feeling/life crisis before when I graduated from high school and went into my first semester of college. I felt more than completely out of my element, I didn't feel equipped to be able to complete what was ahead of me, I thought to myself “how the hell am I going to get a bachelor's degree”...and eventually when I took it a day at a time I did, and to my surprise I graduated with honors. And yet the full magnitude of accomplishing one of my life goals feels almost like it never happened.

               And today, here I am again, my thought process this time being, “oh dear god what did I get myself into, now I have to get a Masters Degree and I don't even know how I got the first one, probably some combination of luck, the universities low standards, the teachers just liked me, or I had to work harder than everyone else just to get by”...you know any excuses I could use in order to avoid taking the credit for myself.

               In my mind, right now, I am walking the fine line between having self-confidence/owning up to my successes and arrogance. And academics has not been the only area in my life I have felt inadequate...I do it all the time...I am doing it as I am typing....C-R-I-T-I-Q-U-I-N-G every...single...little....word! Yes, I did just spell check critiquing. And if your reading this and nodding your head in agreement, you fall within the statistical norm of the 70 percent of the worlds population that have imposter syndrome (Valerie Young).

               If this is your first time hearing about the imposter syndrome it's a psychological phenomenon where people are unable to internalize their accomplishments (Clance, Imes, Ament, 1978), this causes the individual to feel imposter like symptoms. However this is not an official psychological disorder, it is more so a term to help describe how millions of people in the world feel. The following is a good definition of imposter syndrome: “Despite external evidence of their competence, those with the syndrome remain convinced that they are frauds and do not deserve the success they have achieved. Proof of success is dismissed as luck, timing, or as a result of deceiving others into thinking they are more intelligent and competent than they believe themselves to be” (Valerie Young).

             The book I have been reading is called “The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women: Why Capable People Suffer from the Imposter Syndrome and How to Thrive in Spite of it”. It's about recognising when you are placing excuses in front of your successes to hide your talents, and no, people do not do this intentionally. Imposter syndrome is most likely a factor of how you grew up, where you came from, your race, sex, or class. These are things ingrained in your psyche, and most likely not, originally anyway, enforced by you. Overtime these feelings can absolutely become self limiting. A lot of women especially do not live up to their full potentials out of the fear of failure and the general feeling that whatever situation they put themselves in, they still don't feel like they belong there.

              So, I have not finished the book, I have only just gotten through the first 5 chapters, things like homework keep getting in the way. However I do believe I have made steps forward in reducing the impact this disorder has on my life...the fact that I am publicly blogging about it and recognising that yes I have imposter syndrome...and yes I have self-limiting feelings almost daily. I have recognized the following about myself academically that I am learning to be conscious of...

-I avoid asking questions on homework out of the fear that my professor or peers will “find out how stupid I am”. I know how dumb this sounds, but yes I do it. My book put this into perspective by reminding me 1. I do pay my tuition and 2. “I am a student, I am supposed to feel stupid”!

-It's reminding me to put the feelings that I have contextually rather than personally. Search for a reason why someone may have made the comment they did logically, rather than quickly assuming the reason someone said that is a sign of your ineptness or inadequacy.

-It's not always “all in my head”. These feelings are especially common for academic women. It cited a study by Christine Wenneras and Agnes Wold where their findings indicated that women literally have to work 2.5 times harder, produce 2.5 times more research or published work to receive the same competence scores as male applicants. They did this by investigating the research grant system of the Sweedish Medical Council. (And don't kid your self, both men and WOMEN can be sexist.)

More examples of real life, really successful people who have the imposter syndrome.

Former White House staff Dee Dee Myers:

She was given all the responsibilities of the White House Secretary, except a few key things like one of her fellow male collegues would handle the daily briefings (she was a back up briefer), she received the smaller office next to his, while he received the highest rank as the presidents assistant and she received a lower salary. (It makes sense why this women would feel like an imposter.)

Mike Myers: “I still believe that at any time the No-Talent Police will come and arrest me.”

Meryl Streep: gets “cold feet” before every new project and told a reporter in 2002, “I don’t know how to act anyway, so why am I doing this?”

Jodi Foster: “I thought it [winning the Oscar] was a fluke. The same way as when I walked on the campus at Yale. I thought everybody would find out, and they’d take the Oscar back.”

So, here is a much needed shout out to myself and all the other imposters out there.

                                              (http://mysunnysite.blogspot.com/2010/11/stuart-smalley-was-right.html)

“Because I am good enough, smart enough, and gosh darn it, people like me” ~Stuart Smalley

(Yes I did just use humor to cover up my talents, but hey I am recognising what I am doing to myself, I just have not made it to the chapters on how to eradicate my imposter like behaviour. Cut me some slack!)   

Happy New Year!

            I hope you all have had a wonderful Holiday and you are as excited as Trevor and I are to see what 2012 has in store! What a fabulous year 2011 was, I think we would both have to say it has been the most eventful year of our lives, in fact we are still taking it all in, and some of it is just so surreal. We married on Valentines Day, graduated with our Bachelor's Degrees from University of Wisconsin River-Falls in May, spent three very long horrific months applying for visas, donated most of our things to the Humane Society of Barron County, and moved to England. We arrived at our beautiful new home in September, and shortly after (5 days to be exact) we excitedly adopted our puppy Nova (a Chihuahua and Jack Russell Terrier mix) from a local shelter.

            We are now well on our way to attaining our graduate degrees. Trevor is studying Computing at the University of Worcester, and Jessica is studying Ecology and Conservation part-time at Staffordshire University (a 2 hour train ride from home).

            We thoroughly love living in England and the city. It always seems there is something fun to do only a minutes walk from home. The biggest changes we've had to adapt to: No car and relying on our feet is our sole source of transportation, the food (I have been missing some serious American Cuisine), the pace of life around here (it's so much slower here sometimes for the worse, sometimes for the better), the lack of snow over the holiday and the excess of rain, and being so far from family and friends.

              Trevor and I are currently still in arguments as to where in the world we would like to reside permanently. We both know we would like to continue to travel, but we also want to live somewhere that feels like home. For now we are both really enjoying our time here; we are comfortable, happy, and adjusting very well (especially to the free healthcare).

              We are hoping 2011 went well for all of you, and hope you are staying warm and enjoying every minute of your time off. Best wishes for 2012 and all the great things in life that are yet to come.

Love,

Jessica, Trevor, and Nova